About Annika
Annika Natseway, She/her
Autonomous Community Midwife, consultant/Educator, facilitator
A HUMAN ABIDING BY “SELF-LAW”
The word AUTONOMOUS literally means “self law,” having one’s own laws…To fully embody our own divine commandments, to bind ourselves to right relationship with our core values.
And to BE in right relationship with those core values we must actually know what those are, and do the extensive inner deconstruction + shedding + rebuilding to live that actualization fully.
This is the work I am called to do, within myself and with others. We dig into the dirt to find the gifts, the medicine.
What do I believe? And what do I KNOW in the marrow of my bones? What I find there in the marrow is the truth that I will live and die by. Autonomy of body and soul protects and galvanizes these knowings.
And for these reasons, whether we are working together to prepare for your birth, or walking together as you traverse another rite of passage, my vow to you is honor your living truth, as I live and honor mine.
FINDING PURPOSE IN THE DARK
Over the years I have come to learn that my earthwalk always takes me on the dimly-lit, rocky path that has been traveled by few, forcing me to break trail for myself and hold a light for others.
My main teachers in this life have been wailings of Grief, and sharp pangs of Heartbreak, being asked to untangle old webs and let myself unravel, only to then be directed by Mama Earth and Spirit to my highest callings and truths.
Of course, this work is never done, and I am constantly unraveling and reweaving, but I have now been called to carry a lantern for others as they guide their own fingers through the ball of red thread.
My purpose in this world is to build myself as a rooted sanctuary, resource, and witness for those who are ready, willing, and determined to live + birth in full freedom + power, completely outside industries of violence and oppression.
When we say YES to crossing our rites of passage in this way, we say YES to creating a world born of raw love, justice, and peace.
WRITTEN IN MY BLOOD
My path in Birth is something that has never really had a distinct starting point or beginning. Much like the ever-churning nature of birth, death, and the other rites of passages on this wheel of life, being a guardian of Birth space is something that has dwelled inside me my entire life---it is something that I cannot separate myself from, something that I can only allow to be uncovered.
The uncovering began the day I was born. My mother birthed me in the hospital without medication, as a doctor held me by force inside her body to suction my nose before my shoulders and body came spiraling out. I stayed in the NICU for 3 days, with my freshly postpartum mother sleeping day + night in the waiting room for the chance to breastfeed me every couple hours. The reason given for separating me for 72 hours from the only home I knew—my mother, was polycythemia, supposedly due to being “attached to the placenta for too long”. Knowing what I know now, this is nonsense. Being separated from my mother left me with a primal wound, and I believe this experience has poignantly informed and directed my passion and calling on this path.
As a child, I often watched marathon after marathon of birth TV shows with my mother…fascinated, completely enraptured, in awe of what I saw as magic. As these highly medicalized, pathology-centered ideas + images of birth were the only I had witnessed, I decided that when I grew up I would be an OBGYN. As you can see, that dream changed in a BIG way.
When I was around 10 or 11, my mother began studying to make a shift in careers—from teacher to nurse midwife. Much I remember about the time she was completing beginning courses was how much content she was required to learn that (in my young, wise eyes) didn’t have anything to do with what I thought birth was. As a result of witnessing this disconnect, my interests began to wander away from birth and obstetrics. In the end, my mom, a single mother of 3 with very little support, wasn’t able to finish her studies, and is still in the educational field today.
The journey through my teenage years and early college took me through many different interests academically, including music education/performance, elementary education, and arts management, all of which informed different aspects of who I am in life + the birth space now. In the second-to-last year of college, I took a women and gender studies course, with only one class period of the entire semester dedicated to the reproductive rights issues surrounding birth. This one class period just so happened to be taught by a guest speaker who was a radical student midwife in my area. I enjoyed the class thoroughly, deeply resonating with what was shared, but remaining in the dark to the fact that a seed already within me had been fertilized.
Fast-forward three years and two corporate jobs later, and I had started my own transformative healing practice, integrating Reiki, sound healing, and intuitive coaching for facilitation of deep healing. It was at this point that I began to draw parallels between the processes of pregnancy + birth and that of emotional/spiritual transformation.
These threads of connection instantaneously reignited my childhood passion for all things birth, which lead me to completing my Holistic Doula Certification in February 2016 with Whapio Bartlett of the Matrona. Following this certification, I reached out to a local independent, unlicensed midwife, wanting to be of service to the new/ancient paradigm of birth in whatever ways I could.
DESCENT INTO THE UNDERWORLD
Near the beginning of my apprenticeship, I became pregnant with my first and only child (so far). As a very fat woman, I spent a lot of time in my first trimester researching the supposed “risks” of birthing while fat—because we’re programmed to believe that it is dangerous, reckless, and irresponsible to be fat and pregnant. What I observed in my learning is that much written about the subject is incredibly biased and fatphobic, and that medically-managed care of fat parents often ended in self-fulfilling prophecy. Through this research and by spending time in some mainstream “Plus Pregnancy” Facebook groups, I came to the conclusion that I did not consider myself high risk at all or in need of medical care, and that I would be much better off being the director of my own care (what a concept!). I proceeded through the pregnancy on my own, having occasional chats and just-for-fun belly feeling with my mentor midwife. My daughter Ruby was born uneventfully near Winter Solstice into my and my mother’s hands in my dark, cave-like bathroom, at 42+3 weeks gestation.
Ruby’s pregnancy, birth, and postpartum was a descent into the Underworld for me, uncovering everything that still hid in the shadowy corners of my nervous system, forcing me to meet my own mortality + fractured soul in a way I had never experienced up until that point. I was in an abusive relationship and felt deeply unsupported in the ways that I desperately thirsted for—mostly to be witnessed by someone strong enough to meet me in the depths of the shamanic awakening I was trudging through. This experience of going it all alone, white-knuckling it through the darkest time of my life, has inspired and saturated who I am as a birth attendant and consultant now. I see my main role as a shamanic witness, space-holder, and when needed, as a guide.
WHEN YOUR COMMUNITY CALLS UPON YOU, YOU RISE UP
In the first couple years following the birth of my daughter, I continued my apprenticeship and midwifery studies while surviving babyhood and early toddlerhood, then eventually parted ways with my mentor in early 2020. At that time, my community began to call upon me to walk with them through their pregnancies, births, losses, and abortions, affording me the most sacred opportunity to learn + serve at the feet of the people in front of me, the truest teachers. Thus began my solo practice in new paradigm midwifery.
I will forever be grateful for the families that have entrusted me to care for them in their most vulnerable passages, and have allowed me to come into my role in our community with such grace and support. This work does not exist without you special souls who choose this sacred way.
THE CUT-AND-DRY
For those who do well with lists, here are the brief bullet points of my experience + training:
My first entrance into formal birth training was a Holistic Doula training with The Matrona in early 2016. I attended births as a doula in many settings, including birth center and hospital.
I served for 18 months (spread over 4 years) as an apprentice/assistant to an unlicensed, independent midwife, attending powerfully autonomous prenatals, births, and postpartums, many midwifery skills workshops, and was an assistant teacher for countless physiological birth classes.
My experience includes time spent studying with The Matrona Quantum Midwifery Program, emergency skills trainings, physiological breech trainings, herbal + homeopathic training, and more. I am in a constant state of continuing education, learning, and deepening (as I believe every attendant should be).
I am an energy worker and teacher, and have spent more than 12 years deeply engaged under the tutelage of Great Spirit. I have 8 years experience facilitating transformative space of many types, including one-on-one healing + shadow work, sound meditation, and group work in womb-oriented circles. This work is deeply applicable and relevant to the transformative reproductive rites I now accompany folks through.
I am trauma-literate + nervous system-literate (again, this is a never ending journey), and work diligently every day to dismantle patriarchal traits within myself and within my practice, continuously deconstructing all the ways I am upholding white supremacy, capitalism, transphobia, xenophobia, fatphobia, ableism, and classism as each shows itself.
To have a transparent discussion around the specifics of my skills and training, please schedule a free consultation.
My areas of interest are not only specific to birth, but expand to each of the other spokes on the wheel of life: menarche, menstruation as ceremony throughout the bleeding years, menopause, and death. I see this Threshold work as inseparable from the larger, global mission of liberation for all.
I spend my time outside of client sessions and births studying anti-capitalism, anarchy, + decolonization, wandering the many trails of Northern Arizona with my toddler, making plant medicine, and listening to podcasts from kindred souls.
If you have questions about me or what I offer, please see the links below, schedule a free consultation with me, or shoot me an email through the contact page.
Can’t wait to connect!
xxoo Annika
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